Yeah. He only has one pet... one pet that is fucking OONDASTA. So that was painful sucker punch, but he succumbed to a heavy hitting mecanical team. Lightning storm plus double ion cannon for the win.
{Sunreaver Construct, Darkmoon Tonk, Tranquil Mechanical Yeti}
Sunday I had breakfast and then sat down for the Celestial Tournament. I set up seven different dummy teams, and embarked upon my path of pet destruction. The basic format of the Celestial tournament is that you fight three Master Tamers and then four children of the celestials. You also can't heal your pets outside of a battle. Fortunately your character is also off in a solo scenario so you don't have masses of people watching to see how you do.
I've written up a guide of my teams I used for each tamer and all the celestials, but it uses a lot of rare pets. If anyone reading this is actually trying the celestial tournament look at the abilities I've used and swap in similar pets.
I have to admit that this is the closest I've come while playing WoW to taking my laptop and smashing it against the table while screaming in rage and fury. I had to pause and log out a few times just to keep from losing my shit. These master tamers are hard. Individually each fight is roughly as difficult as some of the harder Pandaren Masters, but the fact that you can't rez pets in between adds a whole new level of difficulty. Choosing teams so that you have enough strong pets for each tamer and celestial is a tricky balancing act. Any bad rng means you need to start the entire thing over again.
Celestial Tournament Guide
The first three tamers rotate in and out. This week they were Lorewalker Cho, Dr. Ion Goldbloom. and Sully "The Pickle".
Lorewalker Cho
{Legs, Fel Flame, Minfernal}
Cast Focus Beams twice and then Mana Surge, Legs will die before he gets another ability off, but the owl will be dead. Bring in the Fel Flame and go to town with Flamebreath and Conflagrate. If your Fel Flame lasts long enough dot up Cho's third pet. Bring in the Minfernal and immediately hit Meteor Strike, you really need to avoid the big hits when the Cho's dragon is buffed. Then just smash away with Crush until you win.
Dr. Ion Goldblom
{Netherspace Abyssal, Pocket Reaver, Emerald Protodrake}
For some reason I had a lot of trouble with this tamer. I think I could benefit from swapping the Emerald protodrake for another pet that had dragonkin attacks but wasn't vulnerable to magic or humanoid damage. Anyway I sent the abyssal in, and hit immolate, dotted the enemy pet, meteor, and then swapped out, which synced with the flyer feigning death. Pocket reaver comes in and punches the second pet (beast) until it is dead. Keep punching until your reaver dies. This will take out the beast and the flyer unless you're super unlucky. Swap the protodrake in and flame the 3rd pet until it's dead.
Sully the Pickle
{Jungle Grub, Calico Cat, Gilded Moth}
A snail would have been really nice here, but I made do with a Jungle Grub. Acidic Goo, then Burrow, then Gnaw. Refresh Acidic Goo on the rabbit and hold out as long as you can to let the Haunted debuff fall off. With the Calico Cat just Pounce on the rabbit as much as you can. Use Prowl if the rabbit burrows. Bring your moth in for the otter, which will lead off with a dodge attack to don't use Cocoon until after that has been cast.
Once you defeat the initial three tamers you get to face off against the children of the Celestials.
Xu-fu
{Dragon Kite, Darkmoon Zeppelin, Tranquil Mechanical Yeti}
Xu-fu is Xuen's child. He's an adorable lil white tiger, who will devour pets if he kills them and get an absolutely huge heal. I went with a team that was similar to what I use for Greyhoof in Valley of Four winds. I opened up with Dragon Kite's Lightning Storm. Quickly swapped in the Zeppelin and put up Decoy, then pounded away with missile. Swap the Zeppelin out just before you think it will die. Tranquil Mechanical Yeti can punch Xu-fu as much as needed until you can finish him off with Ion Cannon.
Zao
{Sunreaver Construct, Clockwork Gnome, Darkmoon Tonk}
Zao hits hard and will heal half his health with wish if you don't kill him soon enough. Just like Xu-fu I opened up with lightning storm, then swapped in Clockwork Gnome to lay down turrets and punch him in the face. When the gnome died I used the Darkmoon Tonk's lovely combo of Shock and Awe and then Ion Cannon to finish Zao off.
Yu'la
{Kun-lai Runt, Hopling, Anubisath Idol}
Yu'la child of Yu'lon was a cute little jade dragon. I went with an all humanoid team to take her out. I chose humanoids with stuns and abilities that hit hard, like Crush. Yu'la's shield mitigates a lot of damage and he also flies up to entirely avoid a fair amount of damage. Fortunately he is pretty slow do you can get some nice stuns off with your hopling. Deflect the liftoff when using your idol, restart the fight if your Kun-lai Runt doesn't freeze Yu'la to start with.
Chi-chi
{Corefire Imp, Vicidous Globule, Festival Lantern}
I had the most trouble with Chi-chi. I've found that the magic pets I have seem to have low health. So it felt difficult to do enough damage before my pets died. And the usual magic family ability of not taking a single big hit is thwarted by Chi-chi's multi-hit attack. I eventually went in with Corefire Imp for Immolate and Wild magic. Then swapped to Vicidious Globule and used Expunge every time it was up. Then tried to finish off with the Festival Lantern's Flash and Light. If rng had been particularly unkind I could bring back the Corefire Imp for a last hit or two. Just watch the cooldown of Chi-chi's dodge ability; don't waste an ability with a CD when it is up.
At least once you beat the Celestial Tournament for the first time you immediately have enough coins to get a pet.
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